I'd like to say, I know how you feel. My friend is the best singer in the school, but she flaunts it.
Any way, the best thing I can think of doing is
A) Not giving a fuck about her talents. You're good at it do so continue trying your best.
B) Tell her about it. I read the whole big paragraph below and I think if you tell her that you'd like her to take more interest in your interests, she will try if she's your friend.
C) Be happy for her. It is really hard, I know. But keep smiling and supporting her and in turn she SHOULD (no promises, but hopefully) do the same for you.
Anyway, good luck,
Hello Friend,How are you today,My name is Shelly Ben Amir,How about your health,hope you are fine and good.Any well after going through your profile in this site i became interested in you.I will like to have you as my good friend whom i will like to share my life experience with you.Your sex, age, race nor distance does not matter to me rather what matters most in a relationship is the maturity,truth and honest that exist between friends.(firstname.lastname@example.org)Please call me on my telephone number here (00221 706 533 622)You can send me your photos through my email address. for more information.
Shelly Ben Amir
Saying that "[you] should die" because you "have no talent" isn't right. Apparently you do have talent, since you mentioned being good at art, but you have to accept there'll always be someone better.
Your friend probably doesn't care. I honestly wouldn't mind if my friend was worse at art than I was. Don't try to make this about yourself. If your friend is good at all those things, let her. Don't let your jealousy get in the way of your friend being herself, and accomplishing things, or getting in the way of your friendship.
I'm not going to tell her to stop making art or stop being in band or going on vacation or whatever. The most I'll do is brood and be all emo about it when she isn't around. One of the reasons this is a secret is because I haven't told her I feel insanely jealous.
Alright, then. It's okay.
Also, why do you have a link to "Vocaroo" at the end of your comments? Is that like a digi-signature or something? I've seen you post those links before and I don't know why. :3
Ohhh, I see the link is you reading your comment out loud.
What accent do you have? Scottish? :3 Sounds kinda Scottish~
Edited 4 years ago
Oh good lord.
...Sssssoooooooooo.....*inhales* How would you guys react knowing this is one of MY secrets? ^^;
Okay, let me explain why the name/location are so emo: I was having a shitty day when I wrote this secret. I found out my friend was going to miss my birthday party because she was going on a vacation to WASHINGTON DC. I've never gotten to go anywhere that nice or fancy, and my family can't afford a vacation.
I love art and I love to draw, but she does these digital drawings that are so perfect I couldn't compete. She even got to make a papier mache skittles bag for art class.
She goes to a high school in a nearby town that has macintosh computers, new textbooks, better resources, and better programs. My school is located in central ghettoshitville and doesn't have any nice computers, nice programs, new textbooks OR fun extra curriculars. In fact, Journalism was recently removed from the extra curricular list- a class I was sincerely looking forward to.
I've known her literally since she was born- my mom was there when she was born, with me in a snuggly. We're good friends but I can't help and feel jealous of her. Her family always gets her better birthday gifts, she has both sets of grandparents, a bigger house, better clothing, a better body AND she doesn't have Autism either.
All of this and other things just made me feel like absolute garbage that day and I posted a secret about it. I'm sorry the "I should just die" part is there, I was just feeling horrible about myself and didn't think the secret would actually get posted anyway.
She doesn't actively go out of her way to be better than me, she just is. I've had to struggle with this Jealousy/Happy-for for a long time. I couldn't even go to her last birthday party because I couldn't stop sobbing beforehand. The only gift I was able to get her were rainbow shoelaces, and I remember she got a bulletin board, soap making kit, computer and a whole new paint job for her bedroom at her birthday before that, so I couldn't stand knowing my gift wouldn't have been good enough (in my eyes if not hers). I didn't even have an actual CARD for her, I drew her a card with smurfette on it.
Sorry for posting such an emo bawwfest. I'm just...ugh. I don't know. It's hard to be happy for somebody who has so much more than I do, and it's so easy to be jealous.
Oh my, now I feel bad :(
It's okay. Your comment wasn't mean or nasty or anything. <:3
In my opinion, actual drawn/painted artwork is better then digital. I don't know why, but digital always looks fake or something (I can't describe it).
You know those times when you're really excited about something and you tell someone and they're all "That's great." but you know they don't really mean it (or you can tell they're acting)? It's slightly deflating. Anyway, what I'm trying to say is that if you're happy for someone else, you generally feel happy too. It's hard, I know (my own friend has much nicer things than me, more money, etc), but it does happen to work if you think like that.
Everyone has their flaws, and I'm sure you can find your friend's (lol). Try some new stuff; try to find something else you may be good at. Like writing, or something.
If she's really your friend, then she'll continue to talk to you (but really, only if you want her to, of course).
Maybe you could politely tell her to stop flaunting her riches in your face (that's kind of how it sounds to me).
Edited 4 years ago (2 times)
Well, I've done digital too. A good example would be this: http://i48.tinypic.com/1fd3x1.png .
It's just that no matter what medium I use, she always does it better. Her IRL drawings are all realistic, and I can't even draw a full face correctly. Hell, I'm still trying to get FINGERS to look like fingers.
"Those times when you're really excited about something and you tell someone and they're all 'That's great.' but you know they don't really mean it." That's how it is with EVERYTHING. I get into something new or like a new song and she hates it or brushes it off or doesn't listen at all. She makes me sit through all this stuff she likes (that I personally don't care for and can't differentiate from the other stuff she's shown me in the past) and if I act the way she does-feigning interest to get the other to shut up-she gets offended and doesn't want to talk to me. I don't get it, so I just sit there quietly and smile when she shows me her interests I don't also like.
Oh, she better have flaws. I'm not gonna go muck-raking to find them because that just feels like some seedy, underhanded tactic, but I just wish I knew there was SOMETHING that I was better than her at. Then it'd be more fair.
Fingers. Faces. The two hardest damn things to draw. Perhaps you could draw scenery? I'm not sure what your strong points are, but that's an option. :]
Maybe you should give her my tactics for the whole "not giving a damn" thing. I would suggest pointing out what you told me (listening to her stuff, pretending to be interested) to her, so she knows how you feel. It'll be difficult, but you have to ask her to at least try to give the things you like a chance.
For flaws....well. Tell her to try and chug a bottle of syrup without stopping (not really- unless you want to laugh your ass off). Or just make her do some random, miscellaneous thing you're good at but she probably won't be.
Remember: This advice coming from a 12-year-old. I honestly have no idea about finding flaws, besides going into gym and watching the preps fail at basketball.
Edited 4 years ago
Well, I'm getting better at one position of hands, and I'm pretty good at eyes. I don't draw "realistically" very often, so that helps a little.
XD Oh God. Chugging syrup...makes me sick thinking of it. :giggle:
O-O YOU'RE TWELVE?? I thought you were older than I was!
In regards to that second paragraph, I'll do that. Or at least try to.
Unrealistic drawings FTW :D
For some reason people always think of me as older. I have no idea as to why though haha
But good luck with that - hope it goes well ! :]
P.S. With the flaws part, just remember:
Whoever you are, what ever you do, there's always an Asian doing better than you.
If need be, use a foreign exchange student to your benefit of learning cool sh*t (sorry if that offends anyone).
Edited 4 years ago (4 times)
Wait... you're twelve? You sound at least 15. :)
I don't know if I should be terrified or flattered.
Let's settle on you being flattered. I just thought you were older than me.
When she brushes you off again, politely tell her that you try your hardest to listen to her. Try to find something that you two have in common.
If you want to learn more (but as your school doesn't have the resources), you can try looking up online tutorials to help you feel more confident in your skills.
I've used some online resources before, and I tend to like them better than IRL ones. :D
Oh boy. Okay, let me put down my food to properly type this.
First of all: Thanks you for having the balls to come out and tell everyone you're OP.
Now, to the important part.
Sweety, let me make this clear: NONE OF THIS IS YOUR FAULT. However, it is not your friend's fault either. Since she in unknowingly doing this, it's just your human nature to feel slightly upset over it. What I suggest? (You're gonna hate me oh so much buuuut...) TALK TO HER!!!! Tell you VERY CALMLY how you feel. You never know how she'll react until you address the problem.
Best of luck!
I have a feeling in my stomach that she'll roll her eyes at me again, but I really should tell her how I feel when the time's appropriate.
I was under the impression that that's not how friendship works. It's not a freaking competition, OP! You don't need to be better at something than your friend, just enjoy her company. Same goes for her - if she has some brains, she won't try to compete with you, so don't worry.
By the way, I'm sure you ARE better at something, your friend's not a goddess after all.
She's not actively competing with me I don't think, I just feel like she's so much better than I am in so many ways.
I'm better at being socially inept! :dummy: I don't know. I'm afraid to get into new interests because she'll either roll her eyes at them (like when I told her I was into Jem and the Holograms, or Michael Jackson, or J-pop, or My Little Pony, etc.) or be better than me at them.
Well, you're an awesome SBS commenter. Can she beat you at that? Nope. ;)
:D Ahh, how I love loopholes (is this a loophole? I dunno.)
Also, thanks! Lol. My goal is to be good enough that I get on "Six billion confessions".
I've already seen a confession about you there. (I'm an occasional lurker, but shhh!)
8D About ME? EEEEE!! What did it say? I can't find it.
(There's a Disqus commenter with the same first name as me-Amy-so if it was talking about "Amy", it might be her.)
I don't remember, to be honest, it was about a week ago, or even earlier. I DO remember that it said "AmethystPetals" though, so it was definitely about you!
I think it was about you and AdrenalineRose being awesome, or something along these lines.
D8 Aaaaaaagh this is going to take forever to look throuugh.
Thank you so much for telling me though. :D
Here you go!
:D Lol, thank you. I was going through the tumblr page by page, and I thought I wasn't there when I realized I had to search my full username, not just "amethyst" or "petals". I found it, came back here and then I see you found it first. :D I feel silly, but thank you so much for the direct link!! I'm totally bookmarking it.
Wow, that's an interesting site. Although I haven't heard of half the users.
There are mostly Disqus commenters on that site, but some of the Spartz ones are there too.
She did NOT beat you at art. There is no bad art. As long as it means something to you, it's beautiful
Art does not have to look a certain way to be amazing.
If your best friend makes you feel insecure in any way, chances are they aren't your best friend. Also, even if you don't have talents that materialize into 'tangible' things (art, sports, music, etc.), you might have talents that are actually incredibly important elsewhere (business management, leadership, etc).
[This is just my personal opinion]
So you're saying that the person isn't their friend because they're good at something? Woooowww.
I'm sure when she said "makes you feel" she meant the OP's friend purposefully shoves her skills in the OP's face, at least that's how I interpreted her comment. Besides, they were a hell of a lot nicer than you were in your comment. Before you criticise someone else for a seemingly insulting statement, look at your own.
OH, nonononono. (I'm OP) She's just good at a lot of stuff and it makes me feel bad because she's younger than me and twice as good as I am.
No, I'm saying the people you label as 'friends' should make you feel good about yourself, help you discover your true self and your talents, and likewise you should be proud of them and their skills. Friendship should never be about feeling insecure or jealous.
...*Looks at OP's name*
It's Def Leppard :'-(
I thought it looked wrong!
Please, do not leave him. My boyfriend left me only a couple weeks ago. It broke my heart and I was suicidal before it happened. It would crush him. Think of all the pain you would cause people. Don't do it, you're strong, hang in there beautiful. You can do it. Nothing lasts forever ♥
It's part of the human condition to feel that way from time to time; it happens to the best and worst of us. Every time I've ever been at a low, I've always somehow crawled out of the dark tunnel I was in and the light on the other end was more than worth it.
But the main thing in getting through whatever lows I've had, is in being honest to my friends and loved ones, taking or rejecting whatever advice they had that was best for me, and ultimately getting through it myself. It's unwise to rely on anyone but yourself for your larger life questions and goals, but always wise to be open to advice and communicating freely along the way.
[This is all my personal opinion and should not be taken as any kind of professional guidance]
Tell him how you feel and then go seek professional help.
That is really selfish of you to tell him you will never leave him. I think best thing here would be to tell him the truth and what you are going through and maybe he could help.
No one ever favorites them or comments I've had like 35 secrets, your not the only one...
Mine never get posted
people care about you. there are times when you feel left out but they will end. the didn't post my story either. you have to work through it.
Firstly, this isn't a secret. Secondly, most of the secrets on here don't get posted. Maybe yours wasn't even a secret, maybe it was just a story, like many of the "secrets" on here. That could be why. Also, it doesn't mean that no one cares; you can't say that no one cares at all because it wasn't posted. This isn't a site to get help on anyway, it's for secrets and what we say doesn't make much of a difference because we don't know you.
Comment flagged by community
Take off your email;it's dangerous. I'm flagging this.
Thank you for guilting all the voters into posting this stupid "secret".
There is so many things wrong with this, I don't know where to start.
Listen OP, do you know how many secrets don't get voted through? About 80% of them.
I have written maybe 50 secrets and do you know how many got published? NONE.
And guess what? I DON'T CARE. At that moment I wrote them because I had the need to to confess my problems somewhere. After I submitted it, I felt better and it didn't matter whether it would be published or not.
Coming here to see if people care about you is ridiculous. We're complete strangers. We represent nothing in your life. Why would you care about our opinion?
And do you know that there is 7 billion people in whom you can confide (well, maybe not all 7 billion, but I'm sure you've met at least a thousand different people in your life). Honestly, want to know if someone cares about you? Go ask your parents. Go ask your friends. Get off the Internet and out of that house and go tell someone your problems and if they want to help you, they care.
Honestly, OP. You think we don't care? It's not personal, damn it. I vote yes or no on secrets I think should be heard. It has nothing to do whether I care about you as a person or not. And let me be honest here, when we vote for those secrets we mostly don't care. Because we don't know you. You know who cares about you? Your family and friends. Not complete strangers.
And you can't spend your life on the internet waiting for ME or ANY of other commenters here to SAVE YOU.
If you don't want to SAVE YOURSELF no amount of meaningless crap I write here will help you.
Edited 4 years ago (2 times)
If you make a user account, you can save and keep track of anything you post. On Six Billion Secrets, your posts will ALWAYS remain anonymous, but posting them under a user account allows you to revisit them at any time, and see who has commented, liked or faved. I definitely recommend setting one up; You'd be surprised to see how many people see and react to your posts a while after they've been made. If you have any questions, just let me know.
You cannot read comments made under a user account unless you have one yourself. If OP does not have an account, they will not be able to read this.
Thanks Rebecca! This is a feature we're hoping to change in the next few days, I guess I jumped the gun on it. Woops!
The site won't publish anything for 5 days, it says that right on the submit page. Read the guidelines before you have a breakdown. Anyway, over 1000 secrets are posted a day, and only about 24 are published. The voting is supposed to make those the ones that are the most interesting and meaningful, but people vote yes to everything so secrets that don't deserve it get posted, and the really great ones often don't.
Edited 4 years ago
You do realize SBS is not a reliable measure of people caring for you?
Oh hey, thanks Violet, now when I write something along the lines of what you wrote I can't be the only one attacked, right? :D
Hi, this will sound creepy, but from the comments of yours I've seen, you seem pretty cool.
Since they're phasing out DISQUS comments, I think more of the regular commenters will migrate over here. Even though we all have different commenting styles, more of us are like you than the people who post things like "smile u r beautiful" on everything, so there will be more of us to share in the "y u so mean?" attacks. Anyway, I don't really know where I was going with this, so yeah...
OMG! Thank you fellow..... egg? chicken? android? alien? zombie? human? SBS commenter?
Who ever you are, you red and yellow plastic thingy, you have earned my love for eternity! :D
I shall from now on loyally follow you everywhere and thusly we shall be equally creepy!
(sorry, I like to talk sometimes like some medieval version of Johnny Depp portrayed movie characters. It entertains me immensely :D
I am indeed that.......AWESOME! [if you thought I was gonna say lame, think again :P])
Edited 4 years ago (4 times)
All of the above. ;)
Yay, I am loved, and I finally have someone to be creepy with! :)
And I love talking/writing strangely, too. Apparently when I'm tired, I write like an Old English author.
Why would you say lame? You are awesome! :)
i have the same problem honey, my best friend is a double zero and every time we go out she gets hit on and i don't. i just want to be her sometimes!!
Running away will only make you more miserable, I'm afraid. And also, size 0 is quite the terrifying size for a teenager to have (assuming you are one) when I'm a size 1 and only 13. Be who you are, if you want to change that, there are healthy ways (dieting, growing your hair out, styling it, etc) rather than running from your jealousy.
You should feel fantastic standing next to your best friend(s) no matter what. If you feel otherwise, then they're probably not your best friend(s).
[This is just my personal opinion]
Running away won't change your figure or your hair though. If you want to change then diet and cut, style, or grow out your hair. Being jealous of one friend is a silly reason to give up everything else in your life. Based on how young you sound, I doubt you would survive a week on your own; what would you do for shelter and food?
Edited 4 years ago
Reasonable response. I like it.
At first, I read it as "diet and cut".
Edited 4 years ago